Obama has lost weight

In the past two years, President Barack Obama has lost five pounds and grown a half-inch. The doctor stated he’s begun taking Nexium for occasional acid reflux symptoms, and continues to chew nicotine gum. His adherence to a healthy diet and a consistent exerciser program has resulted in an improved lean body mass and lower cholesterol level. All clinical data states Obama is currently very healthy and that he will remain so for the duration of his Presidency.

-Jasmine Zelaya